When you’re in the thick of depression it becomes really easy to dwell on the negativity because, well, you’re not exactly feeling the most positivity in the world. There’s a reason you don’t ever really see “optimistic” and “depressed” both used to describe the same person. This often extends into how you see yourself. This is definitely the case for me at least, meaning that in the thick of my depression it would be a lot easier for me to come up with a list of things I don’t like about myself than to come up with a list of things that I do. So that’s why I decided to take on this personal challenge and try to infuse some more positivity with how I view myself. Even if it might be how I genuinely feel most of the time, verbalizing or writing too much negativity isn’t good for the soul, so it’s good to take a healthy amount of departures from all of that.

One thing I really like about myself is my creative mind. I’m always taking on creative projects and I’m almost always the “idea guy” for everything I’m a part of and more often than not I am the one organizing things. So I like the fact that I tend to think outside of the box and then actively work to make those concepts a reality. I also like that I can be pretty community-oriented, so even if I’m not the most outspoken person in group settings I am usually at the core of bringing like-minded people together in different communities and organizing different things.

Something I’ve realized more about myself over this past year than any time before it is that I do have a big heart. I am kind and really like to take care of the people I love. When I find and latch on to people who I connect with and appreciate, I have a lot of love to give and I want them to know how much I love them. I’m an excellent friend because I’m always there when you need me, but I also love making deeper connections with people and expressing my love whenever I can. Especially for those who I am absolutely closest to and love deeply, I will never let them forget how much I love them and will never let them feel unappreciated. I like that I have such a high capacity for love, and that’s something I only learned about myself recently after meeting and connecting with certain people. I often seem closed off but can be super vulnerable with the right person.

I love to make people laugh and my sense of humor is probably one of my better qualities, so I like that about myself. It really is one of the best feelings, so I take pride in whenever I’m able to do that. Humor is how I like to engage in most interactions, so if you want to get close to me that’s something you will realize pretty quickly.

My efforts towards communication and conflict resolution with those I care about is something I like about myself as well. If I have a heated argument, or even a mild disagreement, with someone I care about, I want it to be resolved as soon as possible. Part of that is for my own sanity because leave things unresolved can really have a negative effect on me, but I also just don’t like to dwell on the negativity if I can avoid it. I never want to end an interaction on a completely negative note. I want to walk away with both parties feeling heard and not annoyed with each other. If you truly care about someone, you can put your pride aside and fix it right then and there. I like that I always make an effort to do that, and even if I don’t feel like I am in the wrong sometimes I will still do what I can to fix it or understand the other person’s perspective.

In terms of the way that I think, I like that I try to think about most things logically and rationally. I can be very opinionated at times, but am relatively grounded in how I approach different debates/discussions. I like to get wacky with things but when it comes to more serious topics and conversations I think I have a good head on my shoulders. I love having meaningful conversations and getting into philosophical debates.

The last thing I’ll say about myself is that I love how I am self-aware enough to be aware of my flaws but also am unapologetically myself. I love what I love and I let it be known. This wasn’t always the case for me because growing up I used to feel the need to hide that I loved video games and other nerdy things but I am proud that I’ve changed that about myself. Not only do I not hide the things that I love but am very vocal about them and often post my love for the world to see. My “brand” has been built on embracing my flaws, channeling my awkward energy and letting my opinions be known as I showcase many of the things that I love.

That’s all for now! I’d say this was a pretty successful little experiment, I was able to come up with more things than I expected so hey, maybe I’m not so bad after all.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

Survivor 41 (tv show)