A Challenging Year Ahead

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It is really tough to stay positive when things keep adding up so much. Sometimes it gets to a point where it feels like so much is working against me that it’s almost comical. The biggest thorn in my side for a while was having cars that I would keep having to fix every couple of months because they are old and used. So I decided to finally invest in making monthly payments on a nicer car with much fewer miles so that I wouldn’t have to deal with that hassle anymore but now only three months later that car is not drivable and is likely going to cost a lot just to get running again. It’s truly frustrating beyond belief, but also ironic that I invested so much in getting this car so I wouldn’t have to keep getting cars fixed every few months and now I’m hit with probably the biggest repair fee yet… only a few months later. It’s just funny that even when you take the proper precautions for a specific situation, that exact problem can still find its way back into your life again and again.

So if I look at my position in life right now, and think about trying to figure out what I’m gonna do considering I don’t have a lot of expendable income to begin with, it really is very heavy and overwhelming. Luckily I have some people in my life who keep my spirits up as much as possible and I am actively working on compartmentalizing things in a way that this really trying situation isn’t the only thing I think about at all times. It’s hard to keep this up and of course I have my moments where I break down and struggle with it, but I’m doing my best to adjust my mentality so that I’m not stressed to death every day. That being said, I’m really not looking forward to being without a car for however long again…

Not exactly the start to the new year that I wanted, but I’m going to try to stay strong and turn this thing around somehow. I don’t even know that I believe I can do that but I’ve got to convince myself that I do. Positive affirmations or some shit. I guess 2022’s just trying to show me that it’s going to be a challenging year for me, but I don’t think I ever doubted it would be. Challenging isn’t necessarily bad, though. 2022 will be a big year for me in terms of life changes, reinstating motivation, getting myself back on track and improving myself in general.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

tick, tick… BOOM! soundtrack

New Year, New Me?

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Since blog day just happened to line up on New Year’s Eve, I feel like the topic for this week writes itself. A new year is just over the horizon and it’s crazy to think about the chaos we’ve all been stuck in for the past couple of years and will likely be stuck in for all of next year as well. Even though so much is still up in the air going into 2022, I know for certain that there are things I can/need to work on to better my self and my place in life.

As someone who loves movies, video games, television, music, etc. it’s pretty much always one of my goals at the start of a new year to try to discover and enjoy more of those than in the year previous. I’m thinking I’ll reflect on exactly how much new stuff I enjoyed this year on next week’s blog, but off-hand I know that I started the year off strong but then really tapered off for at least the second half and as a result I haven’t even had time to play a game or watch a show in weeks. So there’s definitely room for me to enjoy a lot more next year.

As an extension of that, a big goal for me going into next year is to really figure out a good schedule so that I can improve my quality of life by being able to balance my work time, my creative time, and my free time in a way that feels more manageable and less overwhelming. My biggest problem currently tends to be that I spend so much time working on videos or working that I don’t have as much time for myself as I’d like. So as a result I’ve got shelves of games and movies going untouched. In 2022 I’m going to make an effort to consume and discover more in general.

In addition I’d like to diversify my activities and hobbies more. Meaning that just because movies, video games, music, and television are some of my favorite things, I don’t want to hesitate to branch outside of those things more often with things like books which I’ve been meaning to get back to for years, writing more and expressing myself in more creative ways, or much more outdoors/physical activities. This will help everything not to feel as rote because while I do want to establish a more comfortable schedule, I also don’t want to confine myself to a monotonous or restrictive routine. There’s a perfect balance somewhere in there that I’d like to find.

With an effort to do more things outdoors and more physical activities comes my desire to be an entirely healthier person in 2022. This comes in every aspect of my self, really, from my physical health to my mental health to my emotional well-being. I need to exercise more, I need to really work on my diet, and I need to focus on putting less stress on myself and work towards a happier me. I would love to come out of 2022 having made significant improvements in my health.

My work life is obviously a big thing I’d like to change in 2022 as well. Not only would I like for my work to be less of a hinderance on my creativity and motivation, but I’d like for it to reinforce those things. Not just be less intrusive on my video-making and free time but rather bridge the gap between those things perhaps. This is an aspect of my life that needs to change and will change in 2022 so that I can truly be happy. I can’t have such a time-consuming part of my life continue to hold me back. Once I fix this part of my life then my living conditions, finances, and overall state of my mind will have much more room to grow and improve as a result. This will be my biggest hurdle to overcome and nip in the bud in 2022.

So for the new year I have a lot to work on but ultimately it all comes down to working towards finding a happier and fuller version of myself. 2021 has genuinely had everything from my lowest lows to my highest highs from beginning to end. My mission now is to make those highs more consistent by keeping what makes me happy and removing/changing what doesn’t. It’s time to fix my whole shit in 2022.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

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