Review: Pentatonix – The Lucky Ones

I stumbled across Pentatonix back in 2015 and it’s kind of wild to think about how much such a seemingly insignificant event has impacted my life since. Not only did it reawaken a love and appreciation for music that I didn’t really know was there, but it was a big part of what drew people in to my YouTube channel to begin with and led to many more opportunities and friendships as a result. They’re the only artist I’ve attended any concerts for and I’ve even met them a couple of times. They’re really the only artist I’ve ever actually been a part of the fan community for and that allowed me to meet a lot of cool people and then go to PentaCon in Texas where I met even more cool people (and even got to be on a panel there!). I don’t think anything will ever truly match my love of them around the 2016-18 time period and being very active right in the middle of the fandom during that time but I definitely still have a love for the group and the music that they continue to put out, and I probably always will.

After Avi left the group in 2017 I knew I would continue to support them but I always had this feeling that their music would never quite live up to the quality that it was when he was there. But I’m happy to report that I continue to be impressed by their albums, and in fact their most recent albums are some of their best ever. Their We Need a Little Christmas album, which they released in 2020, was stellar in spite of me previously feeling like maybe they should take a break from doing so many Christmas albums before they completely run out of material. Their latest album, The Lucky Ones, had no business being as good as it was. It’s a rarity that I don’t feel the need to skip any tracks in an album, and The Lucky Ones does that effortlessly. They managed to capture such a unique vibe with this album that is unlike any of their albums before it (and starkly different than their self-titled album back in 2015 which is their only other all-original album thus far). It’s this unique tone, in conjunction with the fact that all of the tracks seem to lead into each other so seamlessly, that makes the album so easy to listen to without skipping a track.

Happy Now is a song that I fell in love with as soon as I heard it for the first time back in concert before it had even been released. It’s a really feel-good song that has a fun energy to it. As their first original song in quite some time when it was released as a single, it really set the tone for things to come.

I feel like I’ve grown particularly sappy over the past year, so the message of Love Me When I Don’t really resonates with me now and it’s really important for that reason. Overall as a song I don’t know if it’s necessarily one of my favorites on the album but it’s nice enough and I tend to be partial to Kirstin’s voice so I like that she has such a big role in it for sure.

Coffee In Bed is a really nice, chill jam. The blend of Scott and Mitch as the leads works really well for the vibe they’re going for, and the backing vocals add a really nice flavor to the sound that sets the song apart from the others. It’s a nice vibe to ease you into the album.

Remember when I said that I tend to be partial to Kirstin’s voice? Well Be My Eyes certainly delivers on that front and again delivers a song with a sound that is quite unique from every Pentatonix song before it. It’s one of those songs that doesn’t break from its formula too much once it starts and more or less relies on that same sound throughout but the sound is so magical in a way that I don’t really mind it. There is also a nice little build-up towards the end of the song that I appreciate as well.

A Little Space is pretty wild, and it’s definitely a jam as well. It has such cool groove to it, and it really allows some of the other voices in the group to thrive, like Kevin, for example, who also provides a whole other layer to the song with the really cool vocal instrumentation. I love the whole vibe of this song and it’s one I can always jam out to for sure (the music video they released featuring ATEEZ was a really cool version as well).

Again, the songs really flow into each other well throughout the whole album, but it’s the cool subtleties that really set them apart and give them each a unique sound. Side feels more mellow than a lot of the other songs, but it provides a nice little contrast halfway through the album, and is really effortless for Mitch’s vocal prowess. As much as I love to hear Mitch belt out with his wild vocal range, this is a nice, warm side of his voice that is refreshing to hear every now and then for sure.

Scott and Mitch are the driving force of Bored, as they are a lot throughout the album, but they again combine to make a cool blend that works well, especially when combined with some cool vocal effects and the backing vocals from the others that compliment the sound as well. Overall this is perhaps the most repetitious of any of the songs in the album but it still works as part of the overall album’s vibe.

For whatever reason Exit Signs just really stands out to me. It’s another mellow song that isn’t exactly a fun vibe like Happy Now but it’s weirdly alluring. And hey, it’s a whole lot of Kirstin, so that’s always a plus. But I just really love the feel of the song overall and much like a lot of the album, it’s one I can just really chill out while I’m listening to it. And for what it’s worth, I love how Kirstin sounds particularly at the end of the song when she really goes for it. It adds a lot!

Never Gonna Cry Again is the obligatory “wow, this is a cappella?” song of the album, where it just feels so full and stylized that you almost forget this is all done with just their voices. Mitch thoroughly kills it with this one. Such a cool sound.

Oh, hey Kirstin, nice to hear you again. This album gives a sufficient amount of Kirstin love, never gonna hate on that. But as I listen to It’s Different Now, and as I’ve listened to each song as I type this, the realization is finally setting in that this album is super chill, so I could see how it might not be everyone’s cup of tea. You very much have to bring a similar chill energy for the album to work for you. It’s not the most hype-inducing album in the world, so you really have to be in a certain place mentally to fully appreciate it. But heck, I love It’s Different Now all the same, I guess I’m matching that energy pretty well right now.

The album comes to a close with The Lucky Ones, which I feel like is a really good song to have the album named after because it really captures the tone and vibe quite well. I almost feel like a more up-beat song would be more fitting to book-end the album with Happy Now and take us out of our more somber vibe we have going on, but this is still a really cool song so I’m fine with it. Maybe a good song to end on in the sense that it eases us out of the album rather than leading us to expect more.

Overall I really love their latest album, which makes me all the more excited for everything they have planned for the future. It captured a style unlike anything they’ve done before, and is so wildly but pleasantly different from their first album of originals that they could go in any number of directions for their next album. The fact that they were able to come out with such an excellent product during these times we’re living in is particularly impressive and just reinforces my faith in their vision moving forward.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Survivor: Vanuatu Review – Tarqaron
Free Guy Review – Tarqaron
Dua Lipa: Future Nostalgia Review – Tarqaron
Checking out Sof’s Fruit Water Szn Movement
Just checking in
Reacting to the wonderful wacky world of Dhar Mann

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

Just Checking In

Blog

I so sleepy right now. I don’t even know why, exactly, because I feel like I got a decent amount of sleep last night anyway. Maybe it’s because I’ve actually been exerting energy outside more regularly and I’m a weak little boy so I can’t take it. Maybe it’s because I eat junk and so I don’t get enough energy in that regard. Regardless, I’m glad I am more active again and I’m grateful I have some good friends that have helped “keep me busy” more recently and as a result I can spend less time dwelling on the negative. I feel like I experienced some genuine happiness this past week, which is a nice change of pace compared to the usual weeks where even during the good times I feel like I always have something negative looming over me.

In terms of the video-making side of things, which is always a big part of me “keeping busy,” I have been lacking when it comes to solo videos (though still going strong with Tarqaron). That ultimately comes down to the conditions I’m working with rather than motivation, though. Simply put, the summer heat, in conjunction with not being able to run my air conditioner while recording since the noise is so obnoxious, does not make for the most ideal conditions. It’s hard enough enduring it for the few hours of Tarqaron recording each week, especially on particularly hot nights. It also doesn’t help that I still feel very limited when it comes to equipment, lighting, and overall space. So those elements combined don’t make for the best video-making environment, but I will continue to make do the best that I can. Ideally one day I can have a lot more space to work with and I can film videos without having to worry about sweating to death or my internet connection being spotty or my laptop not being up to snuff. I love making videos, but all this technical and behind-the-scenes stuff is what I hate dealing with the most.

I think that’s really what is keeping my video-making operation from running like complete clockwork (other than all of the time I have to spend on my non-creative work). Once I just have a comfortable work environment then I think I will have no problem sitting down to crank more videos out. Part of why I have been able to be so consistent with Tarqaron is because it is a consistent weekly schedule of recording and editing, one that I haven’t quite been able to get down with my solo videos recently. It doesn’t hurt to have another person involved to hold you accountable as well. With my solo channel it’s a lot easier to brush off or put on the back burner since it only really concerns me. That being said, I have so many things I want to do with my solo channel specifically, so I feel bad about the inconsistency. That’s something I want to work towards and prioritize for sure, because at this rate I can barely get anything going.

I have a week off from work coming up, followed by another week off soon after, so that will be much needed time for me to buckle down and really focus on not only working towards a more consistent production schedule but also working towards getting other aspects of my life where I want them to be, and prepping for more drastic change in the near future. I feel like I’m nearing a fair sense of stability in the social part of my life so I need to work on the other parts of my life that have contributed to my depression in many ways. Now all that’s left is for me to make the most of the time I’ll have to work with soon.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 14 Reaction (FINALE!) – Tarqaron
Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 15 Reaction (Reunion) – Tarqaron
The Suicide Squad Review – Tarqaron
Our July 2021 Favorites! – Tarqaron

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

Being Sociable

Blog

One thing I’ve noticed about myself over the years is that I really do value friendship and being around good company. I am a sociable person! Growing up and even into high school to an extent I would often describe myself as a “loner” and say that I’m okay just being by myself for long periods of time. Looking back, though, I see that was more of a coping mechanism and a way to justify those times where I just was alone. So instead of conceding that I felt lonely, I would embrace it and pretend that it is just part of my character in some way. But as more and more time has passed, I’ve realized just how friend and community-oriented I seem to be naturally. I’m not a social butterfly necessarily, and I’m usually not a fan of larger, less personal gatherings like parties or weddings, but throughout my life I’ve always felt happier the more I am around good company.

From online forums to in-person friend groups, I’m usually drawn to being a part of some sort of community at most points in my life. Maybe that’s just human nature, that natural desire for like-minded groups to come together and connect, but more often than not I’ll find myself actively starting groups or organizing community events rather than being a passive participant. Even in the parts of my life where I wasn’t a part of any in-person groups and just did a lot of community things online, I would still spend a lot of my time with my best friend, and those were some of the best times that I had. Now more than ever I value genuine friendships and bonds so much, and love bringing good people together. I rarely ever will turn down spending time with good company in favor of spending time by myself.

And that right there, that community-oriented trait, is not really a trait of mine that I was cognizant of throughout most of my life. Maybe that’s why I’ve felt so much regret about how I handled certain parts of my life. I would describe myself as “the weird kid”, or off-beat, or a bit of an outcast as a means of explaining why I don’t need friends, and as a result was dismissive of some of the true feelings of loneliness I would go through. A few years ago is when my depression really started to sink in as I finally acknowledged my issue for what it was: Loneliness. I wasn’t a “loner,” I didn’t want to be alone, but I found myself in this spot and my mental health was struggling in many ways. As I went through college feeling this way, even though I understood that I wanted more friends and more of a sense of community in my life, I didn’t make enough of an effort to actually make this happen. This is a big part of why I didn’t enjoy a lot of my college experience and also why I remained depressed for several years.

As I’ve discussed a lot, I still deal with depression now but in terms of friends I am in a much better spot than I was for most of my college years. Though I still battle with a sense of loneliness which I’ve also talked about on these blogs a lot, most of my depression now is rooted in my position in life rather than just the social element. Now I have some really good friends who I care about and who seem to care about me so that’s a good feeling to have to help with my depression overall.

The biggest takeaway from all of this is that I feel like I’ve realized a lot about myself over the years. Like, maybe I was the kid that sat by himself a lot because I was a “nerd” or because I was a little different than others, but that didn’t mean that that’s the way it had to be. I could have stepped out of my comfort zone more back and changed that narrative then but I didn’t. I could have branched out and done more to change that narrative in college but I didn’t. So now I’m doing the best with my life to live with less regrets and to make the most of my time with the people around me who I care about, now that I fully acknowledge my desire to spend time with good company. Not to mention that I love to make people laugh and have fun rapport with people so a lot of time alone can be particularly draining for me, especially with my continuing mental health struggles. But I’m doing my best and will continue to improve on other aspects of my life now that my social life is in a much more sound place than it was even just a few months ago.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 13 Reaction (Julie Gets Burned) – Tarqaron
Conclusion to the TRUE Gents Challenge 2021 – Tarqaron ft. Ryan
Jungle Cruise Review – Tarqaron

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

A Decade of Making Videos

Blog

It’s crazy to think that’s been over a decade since I started creating YouTube videos. If you go on to my YouTube channel and sort my videos to show the oldest first, you will say videos that literally say “10 years ago” under them, which is just wild to see. Believe it or not, I even had a channel on which I did videos as far back as 2009, but the videos on that channel have since been deleted. So the oldest relics of my YouTube experience that I have are those 10 years ago videos, back when my username was still ZRPGRevamped (a follow-up to the aforementioned channel from 2009 which was called pokemonzrpg). For the years that I went by this name, I was young and it wasn’t as much of a known aspect of my life. I was a part of an online video game collecting community (which I am still part of to this day) and all of my videos revolved around my passion for video games. I was also the host of a gaming podcast for much of those years within that community called “Hey, Listen!” At the time primarily only people within my sphere of online friends and that community knew about my videos and podcast, so it’s wild to think that now making videos is such a big part of my identity.

For the years that I was just doing videos within the gaming community, my rate of uploads and overall interest in making videos was often inconsistent. 2015 is when I started going to college and I got more of a spark for creating videos regularly. I transitioned into doing videos on all of the things I love, not just gaming, and started posting videos daily for some time, and at my worst I was still posting some amount of videos weekly. This is when I really started to find my love for music more than ever before and my channel became largely geared toward that for years to come. To this day, music is the primary subject of my channel and is where most of my viewers have come from, but I still struggle with striking a balance between all of the things I love. It wouldn’t be until 2019 that I would create a YouTube channel with my friend Alec called Tarqaron in which we could talk about everything from film to gaming to television in addition to being able to talk about Survivor which is another passion of mine.

Fast-forward to 2021 and all it takes is one look at any of my social media accounts to see that I make videos, and that between both my solo channel and my collaborative channel making videos is a pretty big part of my life. Some weeks I might post more than others, but it’s pretty much a guarantee that I will upload some amount of videos every week, so I’m pretty proud of that level of commitment. That being said, there are are still plenty of things I want to improve on and lots of ideas and directions I haven’t explored yet, but that’s part of what keeps things exciting and why I’m still so interested in continuing to create videos after all of these years. It’s crazy to think that I’ve been doing videos for over a decade now but it’s almost like creating has been such a constant in my life since then that I can’t imagine my life without it. Here’s to many more years of creating awesome stuff!

Videos I Posted This Week:

Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 12 Reaction (Dethroned Queen) – Tarqaron
SUPERtheticals: 50 New Questions for Strange Conversations (#4) – Tarqaron

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

Big Brother (TV series)
Sherlock (TV series)

The Rise and Fall of Paper Mario

Blog, Gaming, Written Posts

Tonight I decided to talk about what was historically one of my favorite series of video games ever: Paper Mario. While there certainly is a “fall” referenced in the title of this blog, make no mistake… Paper Mario as a series is beloved to me. Few video game series bring me as much joy just to think about. But the unfortunate reality is that I always have to preface my love of the Paper Mario series in saying that my love is for the older games in the series rather than the newer ones. I equate it a lot to a feeling that many Star Wars fans have when talking about the original trilogy versus the prequels. It’s almost a 1:1 comparison for me, really. The first three (Paper Mario, Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door, and Super Paper Mario) correspond almost perfectly to the original trilogy. Paper Mario on the Nintendo 64 is the equivalent to A New Hope in that it is a true gem and you can’t go wrong with the one that started it all. The Thousand-Year Door on the Nintendo GameCube is like Empire Strikes Back in that it is the GOAT and really perfected what made the series great. And lastly, Super Paper Mario on the Nintendo Wii is most like Return of the Jedi in the sense that it is the more off-beat of the trilogy and slightly more contentious than the others, but appreciated nonetheless. Although the correlation isn’t quite as direct, the newer trio of games (Paper Mario: Sticker Star on the Nintendo 3DS, Paper Mario: Color Splash on the Nintendo Wii U, and Paper Mario: The Origami King on the Nintendo Switch) would be viewed similarly to the prequel trilogy of Star Wars films in that they are so different stylistically from the first three and, in my opinion, lose a big part of that original spark and can’t compare in quality as a result. Hopefully that comparison is as apt for you as it has always been for me.

For me, the first two in the series stand head and shoulders above the rest. The Thousand-Year Door has always been my favorite but the original is almost equally timeless and is up there with some of my favorite role-playing games. The worlds, characters, dialogue, music and presentation of both games just ooze charm and in many ways can’t be rivaled in my eyes. Super nostalgic, for sure. At the time of Super Paper Mario‘s release, I definitely expressed my concerns with it in that it was quite a departure from what I wanted from the series and was a far cry from the legendary status of TTYD, but in retrospect and juxtaposed with what was to come, I have a much greater appreciation for it. It isn’t exactly what I want when I play Paper Mario, but it had its own charm and certainly had no shortage of clever writing, with a surprisingly detailed story and fun (but different) gameplay. That being said, I and many other Paper Mario fans naturally hoped the series would see a return to form with its next installment, and remained optimistic for the future.

Everything changed when Sticker Star attacked. Years had passed since SPM‘s release, and naturally hope for a revival of the series was dwindling. But lo and behold, Nintendo bring Paper Mario: Sticker Star out of the woodwork and raise fans’ excitement, only to have it come crashing down with an unbridled rage. Was it really that bad? Well, it is MAYBE a decent game by itself, but it is a horrible Paper Mario game, and that is a trend that the series will continue to have to date. The greatest artistic crimes it commits include completely disincentivizing battling enemies while taking out the really fun battle system of the original games as well as completely taking away the unique character designs and fun dialogue that made the Paper Mario series so special. It’s almost as if Nintendo had no idea why their fans took a liking to the series to begin with and just assumed they liked the haha funny paper gimmicks, so they decided to go all in on that. If you like being paper and that’s all you want from a Paper Mario game, then this is the game for you. It has it in spades.

Color Splash came along a few years later and while it was a noticeable improvement, it immediately reeked of Sticker Star in presentation as well as some gameplay elements. There was still no incentive for battling enemies, really, and the worlds were full of exclusively Toads rather than unique character designs. The dialogue was alright, I guess, but doesn’t even remotely resemble what fans have still been dying for since TTYD. I do want to point out that I thought Color Splash was genuinely a fun game, but it just doesn’t have any of what I want from Paper Mario. It’s an insult to fans to call it that just because Mario happens to be made out of paper in it. Get it outta here. Full disclosure, though, I barely played any of The Origami King, but from all that I’ve seen of it, it doesn’t in any way remedy the problems that I’ve had with the series since TTYD, so even though it may be a swell game in comparison to the previous two, I’m fine batching it in with the prequel trilogy here. At some point I’ll get around to playing through it, for sure, but for now I’ll stick to Bug Fables (an awesome indie game that shamelessly rips off the best qualities of the original games- almost like a spiritual successor for the fans).

I can only hope this isn’t the end of the Paper Mario story. There have been persisting rumors over the years of a true return to form for the series, but I continue to be disappointed, time and time again. One day, hopefully, I can be a Paper Mario fan with pride once again.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Box Art Battles! – Episode 5 [Shrek Edition] – Tarqaron ft. Rusty
Black Widow Review – Tarqaron
Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 11 Reaction (The Leann Blindside) – Tarqaron
Smash Summit 11 was absolutely insane
Loki: Season 1 Review – Tarqaron
Is Dimash the greatest singer in the world?

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

24 hours to live

Blog

What if you had 24 hours to live? What would you do? This is a question I’m sure you’ve asked yourself or have been asked at least one time in your life, but the question usually comes with some level of brevity, like oh man that would be wild, I would go bungee jumping or some shit, I would fuck some shit up, like fuck it bro, YOLO, I’d do some bucket list shit or some shit. But imagine you are really presented with this scenario. To not only be aware that it would be your last day alive but to also be completely coherent while knowing this fact is an “opportunity” not often afforded to people. You might be terminally ill, and you might be given some time frame as to when you’re expected to die in some very particular instances, but even then you are more often than not deteriorating on some level, and you certainly wouldn’t know when exactly you were going to die, down to the day! So as much as the “what would you do if you had 24 hours to live” quandary can just be a wacky conversation starter, it really can be a thought-provoking hypothetical dilemma when you take the time to think about it. It can be sad to think about what it would be like to know of your impending doom, but also really intriguing to try to put yourself in that position. And that’s exactly what I’m trying to do here.

My first priority would honestly be to show appreciation to everyone who has had a positive impact on my life. I already try to make a more conscious effort to do that regularly, just showing my appreciation whenever I can. But 24 hours to live means it’s crunch time. Cut the bullshit, tell everyone my full and unapologetic truth. If I appreciate you on any level you’ll be hearing from me, no doubt about it. That being said I have a lot of ground to cover, so that could range anywhere from a one-sentence message to a full-blown conversation. But no hard feelings regardless. This time would be reserved for anyone I wouldn’t be able to come in actual contact with on my final day. As tasteless as it might sound, I feel like I would have to put out an “I have 24 hours left to live” video on my YouTube channel with one last goodbye because making videos has undeniably been a huge part of my life and it would be only fitting.

With the formalities out of the way, I can go on with living the remaining hours of my life. With some pep in my step I feel like I could have condensed that goodbye stuff into only a couple of hours. What to do with the rest of my day, though? I don’t know, even though the instinct might be to try to check off bucket list things, I feel like that would be something reserved for if I had a year or even a week to live. Because realistically, as much as I want to see more of the world, I don’t think it would necessarily be worth it to spend a significant portion of my final hours stuck on plane ride to somewhere just to spend a couple hours there. So as much as I want to see Japan, or go to Disney World, it just might not be in the cards for this scenario. With most bucket list things off the table, I’ve been kind of stumped as to how I’d spend the majority of this day, but I think I’ve come to a bit of a conclusion.

As ridiculous as it sounds, I would 100% host my own “going away” party and invite literally everyone I care about to join me. Not just a basic party of course, it would have to be a tour de force of experiencing all of my favorite things, with everything from basketball to just some good old-fashioned laughs. The things I enjoy are pretty simple when it comes down to it. As much as I’d like the chance to expand my life experiences much more, this scenario wouldn’t give me enough time to, so I’d just have to live (and then not) with some of the simple things. That being said, I’d do those things in the most outrageous and off-the-wall ways possible, given the time that I have to work with and however many people are able to join me on such short notice. Especially given this opportunity, I’m not the kind of person who would go out quietly. I’d like for my last 24 hours to not only consist of some valuable experiences that I can be happy with *at the end of the day* but also to consist of some valuable experiences for everyone else involved to be able to walk away from and remember forever. If I’m gonna be given this unique opportunity, I might as well make the best of it, right?

Videos I Posted This Week:

Shrek Series Overview & Ranking – Tarqaron
Our June 2021 Favorites! – Tarqaron
Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 10 Reaction (Scout’s Resistance) – Tarqaron

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

Summit

Blog

I am in crunch time today so I won’t be able to do any of the more elaborate blogs I talked about last time, but here I am nonetheless. The unfortunate reality is that as I sit here amidst this crunch time, since I have to work for the rest of the night, I really can’t think of anything to write about. For my own sanity I should really make a more conscious effort to give myself much more time to write these things. But hey, then I would probably be writing about one of the ideas I mentioned last week, then, wouldn’t I? Well, that’s the whole point, isn’t it? I can see I’m getting no where here.

As much as procrastination has been a problem for me in the past, it’s not actually procrastination that has left me with such limited time to write this time around. It’s actually because one of my favorite events to watch online, Smash Summit, was streaming all yesterday and today. And since I was working and then watching The Forever Purge with some friends yesterday (bad movie, by the way), I spent pretty much all day today just catching up on everything I missed plus enjoying everything that has been coming out for it today as well. I have it muted and still playing as I type this, because I just had to pull myself away for at least a little bit if I was going to have any chance of writing the blog today.

Smash Summit (this one specifically is Smash Summit 11) is a four-day event that brings together some of the best Super Smash Bros. Melee players (a 20-year-old game at this point, by the way) for a more intimate invitational tournament environment, which is also padded with a lot of fun side events and skits to round it out. Most notably it features a lot of the players playing games of Mafia at the end of each day, which is always one of my favorite parts of the event. Melee is my favorite game to watch competitively and Summit has always been my favorite event to watch because of the really unique vibe and superior production quality that it offers. This time around it will have the largest prize pool in Melee’s history and there are so many great players present this year that it has been a joy to watch thus far.

I honestly always wish I had thought to take off these days from work so I can watch it all live because there is just so much to catch up on after a whole day of work, on top of editing videos and everything else. But regardless I’m just excited to get home tonight so I can catch up on everything again!

In terms of my mental health, I’m still dealing with smoothing out the real low lows that I experience in any given week, but I am also working on maximizing the highs as well. Just trying to enjoy things more in the moment, but there are still some obvious steps I need to take to really improve many aspects of my life. A small first step would be to give myself more time to write these so I can start bringing out some of those ideas!

Videos I Posted This Week:

Luca Review – Tarqaron
Reacting to the Top 100 Songs of June 2021
Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 9 Reaction (Estrogen City) – Tarqaron
Ball is life
This vocal coach gives me life (ft. So Hyang)

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

Ideas

Blog

I know I’ve kind of been saying this for a while now, but I’d like to have some more specific topics for blogs moving forward, with personal life/mental health sprinkled in there (since I won’t always have enough to say in that regard to fill a decent blog’s worth of content). Since I have limited time for this week’s blog, I thought I might use this opportunity to just rattle off some ideas of things I could talk about in future blogs. Some of these could end up being worked into videos instead potentially, but could work as blogs too. Pretty uninspired idea for this week’s blog, I guess, but let me know if any of this stands out to you or if there’s anything I’m not thinking of that could be interesting…

The Greatest Compliment I’ve Ever Received: This is an idea I’ve been tossing around in my head for some time now. The idea would be to actually have this be a collaborative thing, and get a bunch of my friends to send in submissions for this, just sharing the greatest compliment they’ve ever received. I thought it could be a fun little thing to do to promote some positive thinking and spread some good feelings rather than some of the more serious topics I have listed here. I think this would be a cool thing to do in video form as well, but I just don’t know if I’d be able to get people to send in video submissions for something like this. Regardless I really want to do more collaborative blog things like this Rick and Morty one I did back in 2017.

Does God Exist? And other such fun religious topics: Religion has always been an interesting topic to me. As someone who is firmly non-religious, I think I could go through some interesting thoughts on these topics in a personalized blog environment like this. I always wanted to do a video on my channel where I could discuss religion with one of my more religious friends back in the day, but it just never end ended up happening. I enjoy having meaningful conversations about stuff like this, so I think it would be fun to delve into for some more in-depth blogs.

What is the meaning of life? And other more focused philosophical questions: Philosophy is another thing I really enjoy pondering, but never have had much of an opportunity to delve into in a public setting. There are so many routes I can go down with this, and endless discussion to be had.

My experience in education: This is one that I’ve always envisioned as a series of videos I would do, but it just as easily could be translated to blog form if I’m feeling that more at the time. Basically, since I’m all done with my long history of public education I thought it could be cool to go in-depth talking about my experiences with each stage of education and putting it out there for the world to see. I’ve always thought this could be fun to do, and maybe therapeutic as well. I’ve never really seen anyone online do something quite like this, so I would definitely like to at some point, before I’ve forgotten everything in my old age.

My experience being involved in online communities: The internet has been a significant part of my life for most of my life at this point. I started being involved in different online communities around the age of 10 and haven’t stopped since, so I’ve been through quite a lot and met a lot of people I am still in contact with to this day. So I feel like there would be a lot of ground to cover here, just in recounting memories without any added message.

Talking about my passions in life, and principles that are most important to me: It could be interesting to really try to get to the heart of what motivates me in life and what things are most important to me, as well as just gushing about the things that I love.

Talking about specific games/movies/shows/music and how they have had an effect on me: This kind of blog would be reserved not just for any piece of media I’ve enjoyed but rather the ones that have really stuck with me since I experienced them, and which seemed to have a more profound effect on me.

More out-there topics, like hypothetical situations or alternate timeline talk (what if I never did this or what if I did that kind of stuff): Would love to go down rabbit holes of wild topics like this.

Well there you go! Those are just some ideas, and most of those I didn’t even have in mind until I started writing this, so thanks for that! Even just putting some of these ideas out there like this has gotten me more excited for the future of doing this blogs. Now it’s time to embark into some really uncharted territory and have some fun with this thing.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 8 Reaction (Ami’s Aura) – Tarqaron
Free Britney
Reviewing EVERY Shrek Short! – Tarqaron

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

Groove

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Let’s talk about grooves. I’m not much of a dancer, but I know a thing or two about finding a groove. The odd thing about grooves, though, is that once you fall out of one, you might find yourself in a “funk.” I feel like that was the case with me doing videos on my solo channel a couple of years ago, and then with me doing videos on my solo channel a month ago. Once I get into doing videos consistently, I will stick to it for some period of time. But as soon as I fall off the horse and miss a week or two, then it all seems to halt. Now, as you can see below, it’s not like video production has halted for me at all. I have been pretty consistent with Tarqaron videos ever since its inception really, and that might because we have a specific scheduled time for that each week that we rarely stray from and therefore I always have something to work on for the channel. When I came back to my solo channel a couple of months ago I fully intended to post every week for the foreseeable future, and even though I knew it would be a lot of work on top of Tarqaron videos, I was determined to make it work. But something about this summer heat seemed to discourage me a bit from wanting to stuff myself in a small room more than I needed to. Then again, that’s why I wanted to film outside more often. I just need to figure out a better spot to do so.

So that’s what I mean by grooves. Once I find myself in a groove, I’m on fire. And with Tarqaron I have yet to really lose that groove, but it comes in waves with my solo channel, especially since I have to balance both. I hope to get back to solo videos soon enough, but that’s something that I’ve definitely come to notice, that once you fall off the horse it’s just so easy to stay off the horse. That’s maybe why I’ve been so determined to get this blog out on time every week for the past five months. Because maybe, just maybe if I miss one then I’ll start to miss them all. And I don’t want to start that domino effect if I can avoid it. This ties back into the idea of establishing a more consistent schedule and how that could be helpful in the long-run as well. Keeping myself in that groove is always good, which is why if I can get myself back in that groove then I will be golden.

Honestly I had one of my worst days mentally in a long time this past week. A couple of things triggered some weak points for me, I guess you could say, and it really weighed on me. As crushing as it felt on that day, I just went for a drive to give myself my own space to deal with everything and listened to some music to just let it all out. Sometimes it’s good to just let it all out. But hey, I had that rough day and now I try to just move on. Trying not to dwell on these things as much, but sometimes that’s easier said than done. One day at a time.

Videos I Posted This Week:

E3 2021: Capcom Review – Tarqaron
E3 2021: Nintendo Review – Tarqaron
E3 2021: Bandai Namco Review & Final Thoughts – Tarqaron
Survivor: Vanuatu Ep. 7 Reaction (Happy Rory) – Tarqaron
Shrek The Musical Review – Tarqaron
In the Heights Review – Tarqaron

Things I Enjoyed This Week:

Some Day

Blog

Watching In the Heights has really got me thinking about life and putting things in perspective, aha… The movie was such a treat from beginning to end but some of the themes really resonated with me and tie into things I’ve been thinking about anyway. It’s always tough for me to look at where I’m at in life and think about what could have been, had I just made a couple of changes here and there or pushed myself a little more.

Making videos is the one thing I’m passionate about at the moment, and I’m no where near being able to have that as a career, so I really have no idea what I want to do in life. It feels bad to say that, at almost 25. I’m at the age where I should be right in the thick of a young career and having the time of my life, but I just feel lost. It’s very similar to how I feel about my college experience, I feel like I’ll look back in a few years and really regret not using my time better. Toward the end of last year, I was struggling with depression but felt like I was on the verge of figuring my life out a bit. But the beginning of this year really kicked my ass mentally and set me back a few notches for sure. I initially felt like I had composed myself and made significant progress from where I was at the very beginning of the year, but have since uncovered how much I had really been affected by everything, even all these months later. I struggle to look forward to the future because I’m always worrying about the past, thinking about all of the regret I have collected. I wasted so much energy on people who never really cared about me, wasted so much time on unproductive nonsense, and wasted years when I could have been doing so much more with my life. I guess it’s stupid to live with regret because that doesn’t help me do what I need to do to move forward now, but I realistically can’t help myself.

I’ve always been an introspective person, but I find myself just thinking a lot recently, but probably to an unhealthy degree in the sense that I have become hypersensitive about every aspect of my life and the more thought I put into everything, the worse I tend to feel. I really hope I can be happy with myself and my life some day, because right now it is just so hard to see. Am I capable of happiness? Sure. Do I experience moments of happiness pretty much every day? Sure, but they just feel like momentary distractions from the reality of my situation rather than any actual reflection of my mental well-being, if that makes any sense. Some day happiness will be the norm for me rather than the exception. Some day.

I would like to take this opportunity to once again thank everyone who has been a positive force in my life in general, but in these past few months especially. Nowadays negativity can really take a toll on me so I try to cherish every positive interaction that I have.

Videos I Posted This Week:

Our May 2021 Favorites! – Tarqaron
E3 2021: Ubisoft Review – Tarqaron
E3 2021: Gearbox Review – Tarqaron
E3 2021: Xbox/Bethesda Review – Tarqaron
E3 2021: Square Enix Review – Tarqaron

Zach Archer

Hey, it's just me Zach!

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Review: Pentatonix – The Lucky Ones

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Just Checking In

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A Decade of Making Videos

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The Rise and Fall of Paper Mario

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24 hours to live

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Summit

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Ideas

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Groove

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Some Day

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